randyland

Phillip Johnson 1906-2005

 

I was saddened today to see that one of my favorite architects has passed away. In the next few days a lot will be spoken and eulogized about the great Phillip Johnson but personally I can only reflect on how much his brilliant style, candor, openness, sophistication, and genius has affected me. Your work and words have inspired countless people and will continue to do so for myself and many in the generations to come.

"I like the thought that what we are to do on this earth is embellish it for its greater beauty," he said, "so that oncoming generations can look back to the shapes we leave here and get the same thrill that I get in looking back at theirs — at the Parthenon, at Chartres Cathedral."

More Cush for the Push

Seriously are black girls fuggin hot or what? Somewhere over her rainbow was a butt that went for miles and back as I was stopped in my traxx. And like I trendspotted last month, rainbow motifs in fashion are gonna BLOWUP this year....

You're The Bone Machine

My j'adorable friend Jackee is another blogebrity that begged to be interviewed by yours jewly, and I was happy to make all her dreams come true, for me and you... He runs the filtheriffic Gay Porn Blog, and even more entertaining is his personal blog where he expounds upon more mundane things like eating bacon and getting dumped and doing dishes. Oh and he came up with this years cult porn classic Wet Palms, which I'm still waiting to be sent to me, which we realized you can do free with pre-paid NetFlix envelopes...

I sat down with Jack over a 128 ounce Jamba Juice recently and chatted about coke, the Olsen Twins, and his sick porn obsession.

RK   You are soooo SF, combining blogging, fagging, and onlining as your job du choix. Seriously tho, porn is like the new dot com! It's so mainstream these days with porn stars doubling up as real estate agents and pop stars. How did you get started in it all?

JJS When I was 9 years old these two black girls came walking down the block screaming and making a commotion. They walked past me and they threw this magazine at me. It was this newsprint bondage magazine filled with truly bizarre drawing of women tied up and stuff. I kept it, but didn't know what to make of it. A few weeks later I told my sister that I had it, (she was 10 at the time), and the next day she snuck into my room and taped the centerfold up on my wall. The centerfold featured was a drawing of a woman tied up with clamps on her nipples. I believe she might have been on fire, too. My sister was funny. From pretty much then on I've been obsessed with porn and have come up with some pretty crafty ways of getting my hands on it. About 5 years ago I started reviewing porn for HX (as "Lance and Butch") if only so I could get review copies. From there, I became a judge for the GayVN awards, which means I would literally get hundreds of review copies. Porn is sort of like cocaine in that way: the more you do it, the less it affects you, but the more you want it.

RK     Being gay is great because we celebrate porn instead of hide it like my roomate in college did. Poor thing used to use his own spit as lube which, I don't care what people say, doesn't work.What do you think your life would be like if you were *gasp* a breeder? 

JJS   God, my mom asked me that one day after a PFLAG meeting . Its such a bizarre concept, because on one level being gay has little to do with who I am: I'm no circuit queen and I rarely listen to Cher. But on another level, it has everything to do with who I am: If I was straight I can't imagine that I would obsess over Jonathan Adler.

RK    I know Jonathan, he has amazing skin for a Jew. Ok, two part question : Have you ever auditioned to be on a reality TV show, and if you could eff someone famous who would it be and why?

JJS  Up close his skin isn't so great. I've never auditioned for a reality TV show for fear of making a fool out of myself. However, last year my porn-entanglements afforded me the oportunity to be on two "newsy expose" TV shows about the porn industry. One was for Swedish TV and the hosts pretended to be auditioning for Wet Palms, the hit gay porn soap opera I co-wrote and created. The other was this show for the BBC that was doing a profile on Precious Moments -- er -- I mean Michael Solider. I had to pretend that I was a cameraman filming a scene that Soldier was directing. Michael's never really directed, and I've never really filmed a sex scene, but we were both more than happy to pretend once they pointed a betacam at us.

RK    I saw the most amazing show about ABBA the other night and it had all these clips from Swedish TV. I love how the Swedes are trying to create the perfect society much like gay men in the mid 90's did. But somewhere down the road they fucked it all up, quel surprise. Speaking of perfect, any thoughts on the Olsen twins?

JJS  That's a question a child would ask, but not a childish question. I don't know if I have the room or time to get into it, but for some, the child star fascination is like waiting for something bad to happen. For me, it's not so simple. They were cast on "Full House" when they one years old. Neither their parents nor the producers of the show had any idea if they'd turn out pretty or if they'd even ever be able to read their lines. And yet, they ended up saving the show. Their movies (most of which I've seen) are terrible, but they released them so frequently, that they act as this text which document their childhood and their maturation. Never before has a child's growth been so well-documented. In their earlier work they play themselves ("Mary-Kate and Ashley") but as time goes on, they start to take on different roles: In "Billboard Dad," they become Tess and Emily Tyler. In "Passport to Paris," they're ex-patriots Mel And Ally Porter. In "Our Lips Are Sealed," they're Andrea and Karla Frauenfelder and go into the wintness protection program. It's like the logical, commerical conclusion of Cindy Sherman's artwork.

RK   OMG do you have "Passport to Paris"... if not I was gonna get it for you. They sell it for $7.99 at Duane Reade. You have 374 friendsters. How many have you fuckstered?

JJS   I only have 334 at press time. I've met most of them, too. I'm not some fronter like LINUS who finds people and just goes through your list stealing your friends. I once came up with a formula: The Friendster Fuck Quotient, where you count the number of people you've fucked, divided by your total number of friendsters and then multiplied by 100. Mine was really low thanks in part to my Victorian sexual sensibilites and in part to the fact that, unlike some queens, I actually accept friend requests from women.

RK  You dyke. Thanks for making me yer friendster JJ Shams!

You've Been Struck by a Smooth Criminal

If New York is a constant fashion parade than the subway is it's runway.. SOOOO much style can be spotted on these filthy platforms it makes the eyes salivate for more. Case in point was this stunner I saw in my station this morning. Working a Kimora meets Klimax meets Mona Foot assemblage is hard for most people to pull off but this weaved wonder did what she please, and she did it with ease.  Bonus point for the "sleeping standing up" look that I thought was limited to hooved animals and skinhead-chic red laces on white stilleto boots. STUNNING.

The BS Interview

Who in the bloggerverse hasn't stumbled across the witty and pritty Bradford. !Thank gawd she took down YoungBradford and butched it up recently with bradfordshellhammer.com. She has sprinkled her pixel dust across the information superhighway and us lesser known (but thinner) fags have loved hitching along for the ride. J'ask Bradford Shellhammer five questions.

RK    You're from Baltimore which is lavishly portrayed in John Water's finer movies. Do you miss it?

BS   I miss the crabs and my mother. Steamed crabs. Speaking of.....when I was a freshman I did acid and we climbed this hill by my college in Towson and stumbled across Divine's grave by accident.

RK   Gorge. Bradford, you are a fashion and style icon. What do you think will be hawte in 2005?

YB   I am so over the blazer over iconic t-shirt look.  I think it is time to dress up again.  For me its gonna be all about starched shirts, wools slacks, and expensive shoes. Color here and there.  But mostly solids, neutrals, and lots of black, gray, navy, and brown. I also just got my first Hermes silk scarf, so I anticipate in adding to that collection this year.

RK    I thought you hated Austin Scarlett. If you were stranded on a desert island and could take only one thing to eat, one thing to read, and one blogstar, what/whom would you choose?

YB    Vanilla ice cream, Vanity Fair, and Matty, only because we would be on an island and I already know the sex is good.

RK    You are moving back to New York City this summer. We have rats the size of Hyundais and planes crashing into buildings here. Why the move?

YB   Well San Francisco has homeless people and is the std capital of the world, so I do not think its such a bad trade off.

RK   If your not careful it's easy to become/get both. I've become inspired to be a blaguestar because of you. What have I inspired you to do?

YB   Convert to Judaism, sing Jewel songs, and play the air guitar! (*Blogitor's note - it was a real guitar and the only thing I know about Jewel is she is a snaggletoof that used to live in her car).

What a glory it was to see a really live lesbian in New York City for a change ...lately this city is just a sea of showy sausage swallowers with our saphhic sisters  taking up residences in such remote places as Northampton and Brooklyn. But when you spot one in it's natural habitat raising it's young you can't help but to wipe a tear from your eye (and take pictures bien sur)...

I was amazed yet terrified to see how territorial and majestic one looked in person. You'll note it's thick coat provides ample warmth while serving as a shield against predators that may do her harm. This one for example, states "Harley Davidson", a well known supplier of bikes to dykes, while its rich orange overtones camoflague perfectly with the Q train decor. Striking indeed. You'll also note that her powerful legs are clutching some sort of doll or toy for her young one as a sort of educational talisman.... wait, if we look closer...yes! It's a stunning oversized girl doll that she must be teaching her male offspring the wonders of female empowerment and social strength. I was confused by the presence of the Kiehl's shopping bag but it seemed to be only used as a means of transport for the doll. May you live long and healthy, rare New York city lesbian, and may your son grow up to be as tough sensitive as you.

Distasteful Blow

This was my absolute fav story in the New York Post yesterday (maybe of all time!)..... 

Great idea! Instead of killing a soldier just turn him into a homo instead! What the fuck was in the bomb, poppers? The only thing I've ever seen dropped that causes rampant gay sex was...my underwear, yuk yuk... The worst part is it probably would have worked.

Wait a minute.....did it say 10 years ago??...like 1995? That answers SOOOO many questions about this picture.... 

Raging Art On

Listening to : Jesus of Suburbia by Green Day

Went to the <packed>opening of Moss Gallery tonight which is the third Greene Street space from design genius Murray Moss to make me feel inadequate about my own design career. JK, Moss is my F.P.E. to windowshop and ogle cute Williamsburg artboys during daylite hours. Anyways the crowd was a mix of supermodels, superposeurs, celebs, and gays (try to separate those into distinct categories). I wondered, am I missing Room Raiders for this?

The interior is basic boredom except for the east wall which reminded me of one of my favorite pieces, the Favela Chair. It's all decon wood slivers which concealed a hidden door that bottles of champers kept emerging from, so needless to say my gaze was fixated. And the art - well someone describing it lost me on big werds like "limited edition" and " ironic" but what I think I retained was they are exhibiting rugs latched by crazy people, who are the new supermodels if you asked me.

Excuse the pics for being dark but everyone, mais oui, was wearing black which sucked all the light out of my flash. Fred Schneider looked fantastique even after the tragic loss of the Love Shack a few weeks ago, and adorably confused hetero dreamboy Frank Lentini could NOT stop gabbing about her favorite topic....himself. Wonder if his rug was on display. (im totes kidds!)

moss gallery, houston btw prince and greene (across from the remarkably east berlinesque IM PEI towers)

We are (1/5 of) the World

Is William Hung subbing for Cyndi Lauper!

NYC NYE

.......for once New Years Eve was fun!

First stop was Heatherette HQ......

Best line of the evening came from the delovely Aimee Phillips. Upon seeing a rapidly decaying tray of deviled eggs, I asked Aimee to pose with them. She refused, bien sur, saying "Amanda always tells me it's bad PR to be photographed with food". Wise words indeed! You listening Kirstie Alley?

After friends and freaks did Heatherette we all queued off to Opaline to see in the New Year with special guest Sherry Vine! and other EV stalwarts... Amanda performed "Champagne" which wa s hot but I had juicier plans....

We headed over to the Tribeca Grand to see Peaches. Thank gawd doorbear Thomas was there so I luckily saved the $99 (!) admission to this madness. Lots of electroheteros jammed the place reliving the heyday of Berliniamsburg. Peaches was awesome, performing against a screen that showed bearded girls wearing tranny trainers. HAWT!

Left the show, went to Boysroom, then Opaline, then home. I'd be more chatty about the rest of it but it was kind of a blur after that (fetal alcohol poisoning set in). At least I wasn't photographed with any food....